The Squirrel Tale

During my last semester of grad school, I was walking to class and saw a squirrel running past me—and it had no tail. At first, I thought that it was a figment of my imagination, because surely squirrel tails don’t just fall off? But a minute later I found the tail.

I did what any reasonable person would do in this situation: I picked it up, called my resident squirrel expert (let’s raise a glass to Daddy Mike, a man of many talents, and the reason my blog domain is Queen Jadea.)

Anyway, I asked Dad if he had any need for a squirrel tail (he often uses roadkill fur and feathers for tying flies for fly fishing.) Of course, he already had a squirrel tail (I mean, why wouldn’t he already have one?)

So I kept it in my backpack and went to class.

Fast-forward 2.5 years. I’m in Houston doing an icebreaker with other Peace Corps trainees, and we’re all discussing the weirdest thing that we packed.

It’s my turn, so I tell everyone that I have a 5-lb stash of Sour Patch Kids (because why wouldn’t I?) Later that night, it hit me: I still have a damn squirrel tail in my backpack. The backpack that I brought as my carry-on.

Fast-forward to today (10 days after Houston.)

Somehow, while we’re doing homework for Spanish class, this story came up (because…?)

Maddie is screaming.

Adrian is saying, “no no no no Jade I don’t like where this story is going.”

Everyone asks, “where is it?” (Answer: in this room with us.) 

“How did you get it through Customs?” (*shrug*)

“It’s rotting, right?” (Nope.)

“Oh my God, you have it in a plastic bag or something, right?” (Absolutely not.)

And FINALLY: “Can we see it? I kind of want to see it.” (Happy to oblige 😊😀😇)

Maddie and Adrian are horrified
tl;dr – I showed my friends my squirrel tail, scarred them for life, and put it back in my backpack where I’m sure it will stay for the next 27 months.

El fin.

17 thoughts on “The Squirrel Tale

  1. Restabrook15 August 19, 2016 / 10:20 am

    Hilarious!
    I can’t believe it didn’t rot?

    Like

    • Jade August 19, 2016 / 5:03 pm

      The tail is basically just a bone and fur. No meat on it at all!

      Like

  2. Kay Sublett August 19, 2016 / 11:26 am

    We had a squirrel here at the house about 9 years ago that did not have a tail. Don’t know why. Papa named it Bobby. It hung around for abut 3 years and one day Papa saw a squirrel laying in the road and walked up the drive way and sure enough it was Bobby. Keep the tail.

    Like

    • Jade August 19, 2016 / 4:38 pm

      I’ll definitely keep the tail! I think you may have told me about Bobby before but I’d forgotten!

      Like

      • Alfred Sublett August 21, 2016 / 5:15 pm

        Jade when I picked up the squirrel and saw it wasn’t a Bobby I had to name it Barbet

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Jasmine Johnson August 19, 2016 / 12:01 pm

    This is the best story I’ve ever heard/it is 100% our family and not surprising at all. I love that you brought it with you, though!

    Like

    • Jade August 19, 2016 / 4:39 pm

      I didn’t exactly bring it with me. I remembered it was probably in there the night before I left, but I chose not to look for it or take it out until I got to Nicaragua. Plausible deniability 😉

      Like

  4. Jessica Caldwell August 19, 2016 / 3:07 pm

    Jade. I miss you haha.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Anna August 19, 2016 / 3:31 pm

    You’re so cute omg

    Like

  6. Michael August 19, 2016 / 5:00 pm

    To clarify; the roadkill, mostly limited to A (one) squirrel but includes birds (feathers are magical on flies when fishing) are fresh and caused by my hand.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jade August 19, 2016 / 5:02 pm

      You hunt animals with your car and harvest their remains for tying flies? Seems reasonable. Did you use any groundhog fur?

      Like

      • Michael August 20, 2016 / 12:11 pm

        Nope. And the groundhog as you know fell under the authority of a Henry 22lr.

        Like

  7. Michelle Conner August 20, 2016 / 1:44 pm

    I’m horrified too by the squirrel tail and laughing at the same time!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Kim (Dev's Kim) August 27, 2016 / 6:16 pm

    I realize I am way late reading this but I made Devin &Devin stop what they were doing and read it to them laughing all the way through.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Jade August 28, 2016 / 12:42 pm

      Always happy to entertain you guys! I’m sure I’ll have plenty more ridiculous stories to share!

      Like

  9. Kim (Dev's Kim) August 27, 2016 / 6:17 pm

    Devin and Hannah. Oops typo!!

    Like

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